MAY

Okay I have been dreading the month of May since last year, oh around May.  I was nervous about how to handle the day James died.  Joe and I were talking last night and he was telling me how constant the thoughts of James are right now.  I am constantly playing memories over and over and over.  So we decided that on our blog this month we will be posting memories, thoughts, and quotes of James's that we love.  They will be in no order of most special, mostly just ramblings.  so here is the first one-Okay so to regroup as a family we left the Sunday after James funeral on a trip.  Essential family time!!!  On this trip in on of the backpacks I came across an old camera.  My heart lept and I prayed there were some more pictures of James.  As I looked at the camera, I realized that the whole roll had been taken by James two days before he died.  It's kind of a day in the life...so here they are.

Lily our puppy, she was James biggest fan.  Mostly because she just had to follow him around and she could get plenty to eat(his constant trail of crumbs).  Also everyday when he would come home he would toss his backpack down sit down on the floor and give the dogs a whole bunch of loves.  He would always talk to him in a really high pitched voice and say, "oh hello girls did you miss me?  hello, hello, I love you to!"  He was really sweet to them.  Even the dogs felt like they were special around him!

Legos, I think these were meant for Spencer.  You'll notice that Spencer doesn't have a picture on this roll.  Maybe he was at school, Maybe it's because most of their pictures are already together.  I just know if Spencer loved things James loved them to.

Grace fresh from sleep and mouth full of breakfast.  I can see James laughing as he took this picture.  

Yes scary picture, this is my I don't like pictures James but I love you and will do it for you face.

Oh this one is one of my favorite.  A self portrait.  Smile, sweet eyes,  fuzzy head!   how I miss him!

His life portrait would not be complete without at least one owee!  I think it was a cut on his middle finger.    I hope I kissed it better!

A picture of his piano.  I had so much fun teaching him to play.  He was good at memorizing songs.  He knew Silent night, I am trying to be like Jesus, and I am a child of God.  He even accompanied us for family home evening.  He loved music.  I think he knew things to do that helped us feel important.  I felt like I helped him to learn something, something I loved was to play music and he wanted to share that with me.  I think that is one of the traits I loved best about him, how he made everyone feel loved, (or exasperated with love:)  

Another stellar picture, yes we love getting our picture taken.    James was so lucky in his life to have such an amazing dad!  One of Joes best talents is being an amazing father.  Not only does he spend all day taking care of us but he comes home and is a huge help here.  He spends hours putting the kids to bed every night.  They would get stories, books, songs.  Their favorite was stories from when dad and mom were kids.  Joe has some really funny stories, they would laugh and laugh.  They would want to hear it over and over.  I know James adored his dad!  I know Joe feels the same way about his Jamie James! 

This is how tall he was!  

His how to train your dragon shirt

living room

kitchen

Oh James shoes.  For most of his life James hated shoes.  It was a constant battle , that I lost most of the time.  His feet would be so dry and brittle that he would often stub his toe and the top would pop right off.  Sounds gross and it was.  He would gush blood but never cry.  He'd hobble back to the house and ask for bandaids, and maybe I would convince him to wear his shoes for five minutes,  We finally found these shoes that are almost like not wearing shoes.  He loved them and his toes healed:)  We even buried them with him, and with painted toenails.  He loved to color or paint himself!

He went and played at the park with Porter and Mckell.  Some friends who live down the street.   He loved everyone and had a lot of people young and old who felt like he was their friend.

He looks like a very sweet ompa loompa in this picture!  I love it.  You can see his cracked lips from eating a whole water melon and then having his lips split open from being dried out.  Sweet sweet Boy!  I love you and miss you!